A decade on, will the geothermal ‘Stoke Heat Network’ have to be added to the list of ‘mythical beasts of Stoke-on-Trent’? Oh, sure… they’ve built the pipe network and are continuing to do so. But have you ever seen even a tiny bit of steam from below ground, in a practical local demonstration of even a basic closed-loop system? I haven’t. It seems they’re just assuming we have very “hot mine-water” somewhere deep below the old Festival Park greenhouses site and/or the Chatterley Whitfield mine works.

My guess is that, after next year’s drilling, this £52m (and growing) network of empty pipes will eventually have to carry fibre-optics, when the promised heat either fails to materialise or is just not constant enough to do what’s been promised. What is promised is feeble anyway, supposedly reducing energy bills for those on the Network “by up to 10%” according to the city’s official figures supplied to the government.

So 100% free energy it is not, even if the scheme works and the heat can be sustained for years. I’ll be as pleased as anyone if it does. But you have to wonder if it would be more cost-effective to buy two pairs of Damart thermals for everyone concerned in central Stoke.

In the meanwhile, I wonder if someone at the city Museum has spotted the opportunity for a “Hot Rocks!” local geology exhibition in 2024/25? Possibly to be wryly paired with an exhibition of all the white elephants in the Museum’s collections.